Ugh, 2012 is just sucking the energy out of me. My horoscope says that Neptune is moving into Pisces and everything is going to be just wonderful, well it can't happen soon enough for me. My Dad is in the emergency room right now, dehydrated and failing, he is refusing to eat and drink, we think he's trying to starve himself. It's awful to watch, to stand by and not be able to do anything. He is depressed and giving up, Oh God I know how he feels!!!! Sometimes I wish I could just go to sleep and stay asleep,,,but there is so much that is good, my kids, music, my family, art, the beautiful sky and ocean and mountains and desert....there is a climate and a landscape for every possible person!!!! Breast cancer, depression, death, they are NOT the crux, they are the arrows that are slung at us, sometimes they find their mark, but we HAVE to pull them out and move forward!!!!!! By sheer will, because sometimes that is all we have. I have to reach in, deep inside, and pull out my determination to stay strong, lately I feel myself just falling over and laying down and not trying. In so many areas.
Going to find that strength, somewhere, somehow. Going to rear up against all the crap, and back kick it out of my way.
I am.
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